


Clyde's NSFW Alphabet

by waywardrose



Category: Logan Lucky (2017)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Don’t copy to another site, Gender-neutral Reader, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Multi, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-05-01 18:15:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19183147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waywardrose/pseuds/waywardrose
Summary: He’s an absolute snuggle-bunny. He wants to bury his nose in your hair and kiss your neck and hold you.





	Clyde's NSFW Alphabet

**Author's Note:**

> This is what I used to explore Clyde’s sexual, and otherwise, backstory for [Lucky Me Lucky You](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17757434). It’s not explicit, honestly. But I thought I’d share on the off-chance anyone’s interested.

**A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)**

He’s an absolute snuggle-bunny. He wants to bury his nose in your hair and kiss your neck and hold you. If you need anything, he wants to provide it. He wants to give you whatever you want before you even have to ask, actually.

**B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)**

He likes legs (and asses and breasts/pecs) and pretty faces with mischievous eyes. Now, what he finds attractive may not always be the culturally-accepted/magazine-cover pretty. He can’t say what will attract him, but he knows it when he sees it. Like when he saw you for the first time. There’s something about you. You’re captivating and stunning.

As far as his own body, he likes his hair now that it’s grown out to cover his ears. Mellie tells him that her customers would give their eyeteeth for his hair. He thinks that’s a good thing.

He likes his lips, too. He  ~~likes~~  loves kissing.

Other than missing a hand, he’s strong, and he likes that and cultivates that by keeping fit. After breakfast, you can find him most “mornings” doing a modified body-weight workout. If the weather is nice on a day off, he’ll take a hike near Horse Creek.

**C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)**

He wants to come in you or wherever you’ll let him. He doesn’t mind condoms because he understands basic safety for everyone. They don’t feel bad if he’s got the right size. He’d like to raw you, though. And finger-fuck his come back inside you and hear the nasty, thick squelch of it in your juicy hole. However, he won’t pressure a female-bodied parter to get on the pill or get an IUD.

**D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)**

He’d gotten curious about his prostate before he lost his hand. He liked to press on his perineum or finger himself. The first time he found his prostate and worked it along with his cock, he came so hard, he found spunk in his hair. Since getting a hand that can hold things, he’s been debating about ordering a prostate massager from an adult website.

**E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)**

He hadn’t been popular in high school—not like Jimmy—and didn’t have a serious girlfriend to fool around with. After nine grueling weeks in basic training at Fort Benning in Georgia (where he’d also later go through Ranger School), he’d gone bar-hopping in Columbus, GA with some unit buddies and got lucky.

Or rather, she had bought him a drink and pulled him away from his friends.

She took good care of him and showed him how to touch a woman. He stayed with her for almost a week, sleeping in while she was at work and starting dinner before she came home. He’d learned  _plenty_. When he reported back to base for AIT on the following Monday, his buddies called him a stud and bragged about what a babe he’d bagged. They were good fellas, though, and didn’t get gross about it. They were super proud (even if they didn’t know about his previous virginal status).

There was no sex to be had in Iraq for him. There was a cache of printed-out and compiled volumes of dirty pictures from the internet, old  _Hustlers_ , and romance novels available. There were even some lad magazines on sale at the exchange. He liked the novels best.

While on leave, he mostly slept, ate cheeseburgers (because you wouldn’t believe how unsatisfying they were from the mess), and caught up on American television.

He had a serious relationship, and consistent sex, when he’d gotten back home after his recovery at the VA hospital. She had broken up with him after a year. Her excuse was they drank too much together. Which was true, and his suspended license is evidence of that. They drank  _a lot_  and took his Perocets and smoked weed.

A month later, the newly-sober ex moved to Atlanta. He finally cooled it with the drinking (and other stuff) after she left and faced his PTSD clear-eyed. He’d pulled all the worksheets from the VA group therapy and actually used them. He searched for self-help books and general PTSD info on the internet.

It wasn’t easy, and he was tempted to indulge every day. A shot here or there wasn’t indulging to him. Honestly, he barely felt those. The Fourth of July still presents challenges for him with all the  _celebrating_  and fireworks. He usually schedules off and stays home to watch the  _Jurassic Park_  movies.

After a long dry-spell there was a one-night stand with an out-of-towner who had moaned praises to him and his dick. They tried to entice him to leave with them in the morning. However, he didn’t want to abandon what was left of his family. So that was the end of that, but they parted on good terms.

Of course, there was Sarah Grayson after the heist. He kept the sex to a minimum and let her initiate once he’d discovered her identity. That’s not to say he didn’t enjoy it in the moment, but it didn’t make him feel what he’d come to expect with sex.

**F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying.)**

Before losing his hand, he would’ve said something boring like doggy-style or missionary. Those kind of basic positions have to be modified with only one good hand now. He’d love to be able to be more physically dominant. Or simply not feel so self-conscious when removing his prosthetic. He feels it kills any mood, so he’ll do any position where he doesn’t have to remove or use his artificial hand.

**G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)**

He’s on the serious side, but he does love to make his partner laugh.

**H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)**

Mellie trims his head hair every couple of weeks. When they have family dinners on Sundays, she manicures his right hand (he can maintain his feet, thank you very much). He takes care of his facial hair easily enough with a trimmer and safety razor. He uses the same trimmer (on a different setting) on his pubic hair because he thinks its wasteful to have two trimmers.

He likes the natural shea butter lotion with manuka honey he can find at Walmart (because it smells so good) and uses it practically everywhere except where his prosthetic attaches. There he uses a softening cream/salve only at night after his shower along with an anti-friction liquid powder in the morning.

He doesn’t mind his hair being pulled during sex. Actually, he finds it kinda hot. He loves when you play with his hair or brush it, too.

**I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)**

He wants intimacy so badly. He wants to feel comfortable. He wants to romance. He yearns for passion. He wants to stare deep into your eyes and see love reflected back.

**J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)**

He was secretly relieved he hadn’t lost his right hand in the attack because he jerks off a lot. He sometimes does it in the morning. He finds that an orgasm is better than coffee for waking him up. And he winds down after a shift at the bar with a good tug and scrub.

**K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)**

Creampies (despite using condoms), or coming on you, and kind-of size-kink, which ties into a being called sir. (Though he likes endearments, in general.) He likes praise (being praised and praising his partner) and uniforms.

**L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)**

Any place is great. He’s fantasized about fucking someone behind Duck Tape.

**M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)**

The way a person’s lips pucker around those little cocktail straws sometimes gets him going. Doubly so if the person is wearing red lipstick or a nice gloss.

He likes when you to sit on his lap and wiggle/grind your ass against him. A lapdance would probably make him come in a handful of minutes. And if you’re wearing one of those sexy nurse costumes, he’d lose it even quicker.

The accidental peek of cleavage or the lacy edge of a bra works, too. He sees a lot of that at the bar.

He likes when you whimper and writhe in pleasure when he’s going down on you.

**N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)**

He refuses to be mean to a partner. He can’t stand calling anyone anything derogatory. He wants to be sweet.

**O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)**

Giving, usually. He likes to lie down on the bed with his face buried your legs. He’ll lick and suck and finger you until you come on his face. It’s one of his favorite things.

Of course, if you want to give, he’ll never turn you down. 😉

**P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)**

His natural tendency is slow and intense at first and then getting frenzied and rougher as orgasm approaches.

**Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)**

Anything can be made good, in his opinion. Quickies are no exception.

**R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)**

He is risk adverse because he doesn’t want to hurt his partner, but experimenting is just fine. He doesn’t like surprises, though. You can’t spring something new on him and expect him to react positively.

**S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)**

He’d rather do it right once. Though, if given the time and a little break, he can go for round two (or three).

**T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)**

He doesn’t own any sex toys, unfortunately. As stated previously, he’s interested in them.

**U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)**

He’s not much of a teaser. If you ask nicely, like a sweetheart, he will give it to you.

**V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)**

Having to jack off in the shared bathroom for two rooms full of men while in the Army, and before that in a little house with his family, killed any vocalizations. (He did not even want to touch himself during his three months in Monroe.) When he moved into the trailer with Jimmy, they had a mutual understanding that what happened behind closed doors was never mentioned. The walls were thin, though, so he kept it down.

Now that he’s alone in the trailer, he’s allowed himself to make whatever noise he needs. At first, he felt silly groaning, but sometimes he can’t help it. Sometimes he bites his bottom lip hard and whimpers when he’s edging himself.

**W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)**

He’s thought about getting his nipples pierced just to see if it would make them more sensitive.

Not sex related: he likes cryptids. He enjoys reading about Mothman sightings. Before shipping out for his second tour in Iraq, he swore he saw Mothman. But that could’ve been the whiskey goggles.

**X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)**

He’s, well, hung. At first, he hadn’t realized it. It was just his dick. He’s seen Jimmy’s, and it didn’t seem any more or less impressive than his. He supposes that’s part of being a Logan: having a big dick and everyone thinking you’re stupid.

His cock’s circumcised and a grower. It’s got girth and length, but it’s not monstrous, and no person who’s ever seen it has turned it down. ([Click here for an example.](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.adameve.com%2Fadult-sex-toys%2Fdildo-sex-toys%2Frealistic-dildos%2Fsp-so-real-inch-realistic-dildo-1619.aspx&t=ZWNjMWFiMmYwNzkyMjg4OGI4YjBlZGFkNDE1ZWQ3Nzk2NTVhNjY4OSxYU2s4WXIyeg%3D%3D&b=t%3A0RhYhWecTyfyM5LBUamKgA&p=https%3A%2F%2Fthe-wayward-rose.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F185529611355%2Fnsfw-alphabet-clyde-logan-tagswarning&m=0) And for science, [here’s the one I picked for Kylo in  _Precious Pet_.](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.adameve.com%2Fadult-sex-toys%2Fdildo-sex-toys%2Frealistic-dildos%2Fsp-kink-perfect-dual-density-penis-103802.aspx&t=YWI4NzMwMTA5NzhmYzJmMDNlYjRjODg2Y2Y3MmQ1ODgyYjAxNDE2OCxYU2s4WXIyeg%3D%3D&b=t%3A0RhYhWecTyfyM5LBUamKgA&p=https%3A%2F%2Fthe-wayward-rose.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F185529611355%2Fnsfw-alphabet-clyde-logan-tagswarning&m=0)) The only issue he has is when he has to buy those magnum condoms which are more expensive. He will admit it’s a fun problem to have.

**Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)**

He definitely likes morning sex because he’s fresh and full of energy (amongst other things). He doesn’t think after work he’d be much of a lover. And he’d like to spend his days off in bed with you.

**Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterward)**

Much to his embarrassment, he falls asleep so quickly if he can hold you afterwards. He can’t keep up his end of any sort of conversation. He does try to make it up to you when he recovers, though.


End file.
